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19 August, 2024.

The Family Counseling Center Offers Advice on Dealing with Child Anxiety and Return to School

August marks the end of summer vacation for area school children and, with it, an all-too-common sense of anxiety about the start of a new school year. The Family Counseling Center has worked with children in and around Fulton and Montgomery Counties for over 48 years and is offering some advice on how to help ease anxiety as the first day of school approaches.

Laressa Slater, LMSW, an Outpatient Mental Health Therapist at the Center, regularly works with children and notes that fears and anxieties can often manifest as physical symptoms. “Children may not have the awareness to directly speak about what they are worried about, but their bodies know. A child may complain of a stomach ache, headache, or dizziness. It’s important to recognize that these symptoms are very real to them.”

Setting a New Routine

The routines of summer break and the school year are very different. In the summer, bedtimes and wake-ups are often pushed later, children’s screen time may increase, and meals/snacks are different as well. Getting children acclimated to their new routine early is helpful in reducing day-of anxieties.  “Routine helps to set a pattern of understanding for children,” notes Slater. “When routines change, it can feel as if their world has changed as well so a great way to get children ready for school is to ease them into their school-year routine a week or two before the first day. Your child may only need a bedtime and wake-up routine, but they may also benefit from scheduling a playdate with a classmate the week before school begins. This would include waking up at the same time they will be when school starts, getting out the door when they will need to leave the house, and meeting up with their friend at the playground at their school.”

Facing Anxieties

A new school year means new classrooms, new teachers, and even new friends. For those transitioning from elementary to middle school or from middle to high school, it also means a completely new building.

“If you can, you may want to schedule a meet-and-greet between your child and their new teacher at the school,” adds Slater. “The ability for a child to walk the space and meet their teacher can alleviate the worries they have about not being liked by the teacher, not knowing what to expect when they arrive, how they are going to find the new classroom, etc.” For younger children, Slater suggests seeing if a handoff is available for the first week of school where the parent walks the child to the classroom or the teacher meets the parent and child at the front door of the school.

Validating Fears

“Sometimes children just need their parent or an adult to listen and validate their fears,” states Slater. “We can often hear someone without listening and that can happen quickly especially when a child is crying or acting out. We hear ‘I don’t want to go’ but we don’t necessarily listen to the why.” Slater adds that a child stating their worries is not an automatic request for their adult to problem solve. “Recognizing that their fears are real to them is the most important piece to listening,” states Slater.

In-Class Coping Skills

Children will also face anxiety when class starts and may have a moment where they need to cope with their fears in the middle of the day, in those instances Slater offers a few simple coping skills children can do at their desks. It is recommended that parents and guardians let their teachers know that these are things their children may do when they feel overwhelmed.

  • Deep Breathing – Taking a few deep breaths while concentrating on the physical feeling of air filling the lungs and slowly exhaling can help calm nerves and lower your heart rate.
  • 5-4-3-2-1 – This common grounding technique asks individuals to look around them and name five things they can see, four things they can touch, three things they can hear, two things they can smell, and one thing they can taste. “This practice helps to make you aware of everything around you in the moment and feel secure in the space you are in,” notes Slater.
  • Fidgets – Fidgets allow a person to release excess energy and anxiety. They provide an individual with the ability to focus on the feeling, again grounding them in the moment.
  • Journaling and Doodling – “These offer a creative outlet for someone with anxiety,” says Slater. “Writing down what is bothering you or drawing something can help you feel more calm and centered in a stressful situation.”
  • Going for a Walk – “Going for a walk when appropriate can be an opportunity for the kiddo to clear their head or take a break,” adds Slater.